Do you have an either, or mindset? I know I have. Growing up we often hear the message “you don’t need that” or “ is that a want or a need?” I know I sure did and it’s the same things I said to my children.

But who decided we can’t have both? Why does it have to be Either, Or?  Why can’t I have my needs met AND have what I want?

The good news is you can have both!

The last four years, I’ve been doing a lot of mindset work, discovering who I am, how I think and what do I want from my life? I was encouraged to make a list of 100 things I want. One of those things was a diamond ring upgrade! But my mindset wasn’t ready for this, I couldn’t see how I could wear two diamond rings, and my subconscious mind, being a trained monkey went to work on creating room for this new ring. “Who do think you are, you can only wear one at a time, you are just being greedy and selfish.” Of course, I didn’t actually her this talk in my head but buried deep down this was going on.

Meanwhile last fall I was very sick, the kind that involved my bed for days and lots of Kleenex. At some point during my confinement, my hands felt swollen and I removed my rings and placed them into small chest I keep on my bedside table. My mind is a blur because I really don’t know how it happened, but my guess is, while I was gathering up tissues from the table, I also gathered up my engagement ring with them and threw it out!

Yep you heard it right, I threw out my engagement ring. My prized possession. I was devastated, I wept, I prayed, I tore my room apart, no ring!

‘But I thought that’s what you wanted, a new ring’ my narrow-minded trained monkey subconscious mind said to me.

Because of my Either, Or thinking, I HAD to make room for the new ring, after all you cant have your cake and eat it too, right? 

What I learned is be very specific about what you want, check your mindset, is it prepared for such a change of this magnitude? Are you ready to receive?

As I look at my want list, I am now being very intentional of what I ask for and how it will fit into my life. I know I can have both wants and needs but it’s about preparing my inner self for receivership of this thing and the integration of new thinking.

I’m in the process of choosing a new ring, but my hope is that my original will show up, because I am ready to receive both!

Banish the Either, Or thinking, except and anticipate BOTH!!  

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21 Jun 2021

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